Tuesday Canal Ride Report--Behind Enemy Lines

I was given the assignment by the intelligence branch of the New Albanyers to attend Tuesday's Canal ride and report back with information helpful to the cause.  I created a dossier on each of those I perceived as a threat to the dominance of NA cyclists.  Please note many of the images had to be taken at a distance as if the group discovered a traitor in their midst, losing my camera would be the least of my worries.  Above, the Grand Poobah.  Strengths: Guile and Cunning are his middle name. Weaknesses: Not at full strength so likely to be thrown out there during the warm-up phase to create mischief.  Pay attention if he pulls his pump from the frame for no apparent reason.

Steve Oxley.  Strengths: He strong.  Weaknesses: If there is a middle aged, unattached woman with a large gap in her teeth, Steve may never leave the parking lot.  Someone bring along their sister and this threat may be eliminated before the ride even starts.

Scott Young, left.  Strengths: All phases of the game.  Weaknesses:......

.....dresses in parking lot prior to the ride.  Note the open hatch on his vehicle.  Would be easy to steal a pair of shorts or jersey with no fear of being chased.  If he starts the ride, he will finish with the lead group.

Dustin, aka Old Chub.  Strengths: Weight.  Impossible to lose him on the hills if he has been riding, which he does, every freakin day.  Weaknesses: A strategically placed 6 pack of any Scottish Ale by his vehicle and you can be sure the temptation will cause him to turn around mid ride.  Note to Dustin's right is Brent Jenkins.  I was unable to collect enough information to compile a complete report but he too is strong but may be challenged to stay with the lead group.

John Day, aka Jr Muscle Dude.  Strengths:  Weight.  He'll kill ya on the down hills and flats.  Weaknesses: Weight. Although noticeably slimmer than in the early spring, he still has a couple more pounds to go so probably will lose him on the steeps of Revenge.  Note shown but at last night's ride is Pete Ashmore.  Family obligations prevent him from competing as well as past seasons so not likely to hang with the lead group of New Albanyers.

Now on to the ride report.  I witnessed something different.  A crash at the sign-in station.  A guy just coasted into another guy, partially fell but was caught while having his chain come off.  I like that both Tuesday and Thursday rides are led by mechanics.  Approximately 27 came out for a very humid evening of cycling.

Above, The Donald with a big smile on his face.  He has applied to become a double for the real Donald.  Eric to Donald's left, Matt Ashmore and Corvair behind. 

The scheming has begun.  Ride leader Ric announces to the crowd that next week is the summer solstice ride, it will likely be invaded by a marauding force but fear not.  The outsiders do not know the area so will follow their GPS devices to the bottom of Hargas Lake while the locals will have the correct route on the maps given at the start. Devious indeed.

The A group headed out, all 7 of them, on a 52 mile rolling route. I headed out with the super B's and enjoyed a 50 mile ride with old friends, The Donald, Pepe Lapew, Flyin Tuna, Eric of the Dispatch, Jeff S, Poobah, Mark & Karen Rossi on their tandem, Corvair, a few others too.  We finished with a 20.6 avg and afterward.....   

The A's were plotting.  I heard talk about bringing chains and brass knuckles to recreate a scene similar to the Texas motorcycle gang fight.  I suspect cooler heads will prevail and it will be a clean match.  I hope after this build-up, the NAers come down but one of the leading members caught the flu so.......