No, not from the peloton but by a right hook to the kidney. Flyin Tuna, emboldened by Todd Lee's attack on me finally had enough of my crap. It all started innocently enough when I asked, after noticing a small red mark on her chin, if that was from a razor while she was trying to shave. From there it went to me calling her the Bearded Lady from the circus. She lept from her bike and nailed me. I'm looking for a body guard.
Heck of a night for a bike ride with no humidity, a slight breeze from the northwest, brilliant sunshine and a sad realization that with the onset of fall-like weather, our evening bike rides will end soon (what the heck will I do then?). Abercrombie & Fitch had their annual bike ride event this evening so it may have siphoned off a few but still, I counted 49 people, including a strong cast of A's, including Colnago Ron, shown here with that suddenly popular Mountain Dew jersey. Apparently, a group of 10 wore these during Pelotonia, delivered to them the night before the event by a local soft drink distributor.
Joining Ron were Terry, Mick, Tim Tyler, Muscle Dude, Claude, Jeff S, Steve O up from Canal to try his luck again but this time on the road bike, one of the stronger Walker dudes and several others. So strong was the group, it intimidated me into sticking with the B group, as did Dennis and Kevin H, also up from Canal. Also in the B group was the resurgent Amanda, Tri Mike, Dan, Brain Damaged Gary, Flyin Tuna, Recumbent Dude, etc...
Jeff came up with a good route of 33 miles with a slightly shorter option of 31. The A group departed of 15-16, then our B group of around 10-12 and we cruised out ood 161, making a left at Kitzmiller where I slotted in beside Kevin H, and had to work too hard to stay up so at the turn onto Jug, I slid back. At the Beech Road intersection, the police had created a temporary block to allow the A&F riders to pass and...hey, there were the A's stacked up. If I had to ride hard I may as well do it with them so I joined and off we went. They hit it hard out to 310 where a left and quick right continued the route and also where the racer types punched it hard out of the turn and I was gone, to drift back to the funner bunch of B's We wound up in Alexandria with a 22.3 average and there was Steve O waiting. He had taken a pull on a down hill stretch and when he pulled out, someone used it as an opportunity to attack and Steve missed the group's tail. Dennis explained to Steve the proper protocol of not tearing apart the B group with an A pace and so, Steve promptly violated the spirit of the law by attacking on Mounts.
I did not react to the move becase I knew Steve did not know the route and would be forced to wait at the next intersection so why waste the energy. Kevin, still young and inexperienced, leaped to Steve's wheel. The rest of us, absent Tuna and Recumbent Dude who short cutted the route, were content to pedal along but on a down hill stretch, Tri Mike tucked and took advantage of the aero position to zoom away. This was too much for Dennis and so he jumped with me, of course, drafting and we eventually passed Mike and soon caught Steve and Kevin. We finally reached Hardscrabble with people strung out a little but regrouped on the way to Northridge and then across to Concorde. Steve kept asking me the road names and I suspected he had memorized part of the route and when I confirmed we were now on Concorde, at the first uphill ramp he attacked but I covered, as did everyone and Steve was introduced to the hard fact of B riding, on a flattish route, they can draft anyone. Attack after attack was covered and Steve finally packed it in with Kevin taking a few pulls and all of us noting the fragrant scent of Kevin's f
French perfume, which he splashes on vigorously prior to each ride.
We reached Caswell and Dennis announced, due to the blind corners, narrow road and crummy road conditions, would be a neutral zone. Half way down, Dan violated the neutral call and took off. We are debating what the fine amount will be for this violation but he better bring a fat wallet next week.
We arrived back with a 21 average while Mick and the speedsters had a 23 average. After the ride, we engaged in the usual post ride banter and discussed what our plans would be for Saturday.
9/9/2010 11:50:25 am
I really think Flyin Tuna is checking for nipple rings!!
9/9/2010 09:28:17 pm
Can I punch him next??? Let's have a lottery...
9/9/2010 11:06:53 pm
I think that bald spot on Marc's head is getting much larger! Probably from so much scraping on the asphalt.
9/9/2010 11:08:21 pm
That is not a bald spot! the hair is just less fluffy there...
Really Not Marc
9/9/2010 11:11:03 pm
Why are you so concerned about that bald spot when Cindy is clearly laying a beat down on a innocent victim !?!?! We should be more concerned about that rather than a spot that appears bald but really isn't !!! Come on People!!
Seriously, I'm not Marc
9/9/2010 11:12:45 pm
Nice guns Cindy! It's too bad people are not focusing on your great arms rather than a spot on Marc's head that appears bald but is probably just bad lighting.
9/10/2010 12:07:56 am
It's MarK not Marc!
9/10/2010 12:37:51 am
So I am reading the book right now called, "S#!t my Dad Says". (very funny by the way) It's filled with quotes like this:
9/10/2010 02:56:12 am
You are a wise man, Rucumbent Dude!
7/11/2012 02:56:07 pm
Get your silky fancy pants and bikes the hell off of our back roads! You come out here and act like you own the dang place! News flash for you...most folks drive sensible but for every ole truck you see there is a car going 80 on these little back roads and soon one of you will be toast! And the next time I am driving the turnip truck to market and you don't get over, Imma gonna pit your ass in the ditch!
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